I’m going to take a moment here, take off the professional happy face, and just be honest.

I’m on the verge of burn out. I’ve been unemployed six months. During this time I have been just as busy as I was while ‘working’. The difference is, the past six months have been focused on me… working on my resumes, cover letters, online portfolio, blog, Twitter, LinkedIn, checking the job boards, making connections, applying, following up, interviewing, researching, hoping… wishing…

For the past couple of weeks I’ve been thinking. I’m still doing all of the above. But for about 30 minutes a day I sit in the car line, waiting to pick my niece up from school and just think (and listen to my iPod).

I never expected to be here. I never expected to graduate and make my part-time college job a full-time job. I never expected to be laid off two years later. I never expected to still be looking for a job half of a year later. I didn’t think I would have to write dozens of cover letters and I definitely didn’t think I would ever lose track of the number of interviews I had.

Yet, here I am. When I got laid off I felt confident that it was for the best. I was unhappy in my position and I knew that there was no room for growth there. I had already started my job search anyway, now I would be able to dedicate all of my time to it. No more difficulty while trying to schedule interviews. Since my job search had been going strong for a few months already, I expected to find my dream job in three months or less. I was obviously wrong.

Still, I continued on, month after month, interview after interview. Every time I didn’t get a job I assured myself that it wasn’t meant to be. Everything happens for a reason. I still believe that… but I’m starting to wonder if I’m missing something. Maybe there is some other big lesson I’m supposed to be learning and I won’t find employment until I do.

Or maybe the economy just sucks. Hard to say.

I know there are people out there who have been fighting through unemployment for much longer than I have. How are you handling it? I feel like I’m falling behind, despite my best efforts to stay up to date with all things marketing, communication and social media related. Am I the only one doing a lot of thinking and reflecting? What else can I do right now to help my search? Let’s start up some honest conversation.

For me, the job hunt is like surfing.

Sometimes the ocean is calm, maybe even a little boring. You’re looking around for opportunities (waves to ride) but they are few and far between. You aren’t getting any call backs or interviews, and you look out into this endless, flat sea and begin to feel frustrated, impatient and maybe a little hopeless.

Then the waves start rolling in. They start small, the job postings you find or leads you get, and they grow into the surf-worthy interviews. For me at least, the waves roll in quickly and all together. I’ll go a week without hearing anything positive and suddenly in one day I have 3 new job leads.

Of course, so far, I haven’t been able to stay up on a wave. I’ve had the interviews, gotten up on my feet, felt the excitement and thrill… but the wave always takes an unexpected turn and I fall off the board. Of course then I’m stuck underwater for a while, feeling as though I might drown, thinking that wave was my last chance. I swear I’ll never get back on the board because the aftermath is just too difficult to deal with. I decide I’ll just sit up on the beach and watch everyone else succeed.

Eventually though, I always surface. Usually the ocean is calm and I have time to take a deep breath a prepare for the next set to roll in. Then I do it all over again!

See? It’s like surfing!

As an afterthought, I should mention that I’m not a surfer. I have attempted… and I am in the picture above (taken last summer at Tamarindo Beach in Costa Rica). However, I was terrible and I never got up on my feet at all. I know they say the bigger boards are easier, but the 10 foot board I was trying to handle nearly killed me. I even had a nice big bruise on my arm (just in time to be a bridesmaid at the wedding I was there for!) So, while I can make the comparison, the truth is I’ve never gotten up. Still, I rode a wave while laying on my stomach and that was fun and I’ve fell off my boogie board before and gotten caught underwater… so I know what I’m talking about Plus, I think my lack of success just makes the comparison more truthful. Surfing is hard and not everyone is successful, especially not on their first try. The job seach is also hard and you have to be dedicated to keep on trying before you find success.

What is your favorite unemployment metaphor?

“Communication – the human connection – is the key to personal and career success.” – Paul J. Meyer

This is my new favorite quote. I strongly believe this statement and couldn’t have said it better myself. I honestly believe that so many things can be solved with simple, open, honest communication. I strive for honesty and communication in my personal and professional life on a daily basis. For me, there is no other way.

Anyone agree or disagree? Share your own favorite quotes in the comments!

For the sake of full disclosure, I have a psychology minor because I was originally a psych major. I took a year’s worth of classes before deciding I didn’t want to be a psychologist. I made psych my minor because I didn’t want those hours to go to waste. I never really gave any thought to how much those classes could benefit me in my future profession.

Different personalities communicate in different ways. My favorite class at Auburn was Interpersonal Communication. This class could best be described as a marriage between my previous psychology classes and my comm classes. We learned about communication dynamics in professional and personal relationships. The lesson about communicating between different Myers-Briggs personality types still sticks out in my head. You can learn more about the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator here.

I am an INFJ- Introverted iNtuition Feeling Judging

The aspect that everyone is familiar with is probably the first letter – introverts and extroverts. Communication between these two types could not be more different. Introverts are quiet and think (a lot) before they speak. In an argument they prefer to take a step back and hash out their thoughts, figuring out what exactly they want to say before they actually say it. Extroverts are viewed as more ‘social butterflies’ and often say the first thing that comes to mind. In an argument they prefer to spit it all out and verbally sift through the problems. Put an introvert and extrovert in an argument together and the introvert gets flustered and silent while the extrovert does all the talking and become frustrated by the introvert’s silence, often misinterpreting it. See the communication differences?

These differences must be recognized by companies in regards to their professional communication. Any team will be comprised of many different personality types. It’s important to make sure the individuals understand their communication differences. It’s also important to make sure that company communications are fitting to these different types. If you are an extroverted communicator presenting to a group of introverts, your message may not come across the way you planned.

Communication between different personality types has to be a top priority of internal communicators. The most important aspect of communication is the audience that you are sending your message to. If you don’t take your audience into account, even the most thought-out, well planned communications will fall short.

The job hunt is a rollercoaster. You get a few job leads, have a few interviews, get your hopes up while impatiently waiting and then possibly face rejection (once again) and that sends you down into the ‘woe is me’ pit of despair. It’s tough out there.

After a few leads that didn’t turn into the job offers I was hoping for, I’ve been feeling a little down. I’ve been trying my best to focus on the positive and have been surprised by how much Twitter has helped.

When I joined Twitter I didn’t expect much. I definitely didn’t expect to ‘meet’ other unemployed people who would basically become my safety net, preventing any excessive wallowing. Yet, it never fails… if I post an update about having a bad day or feeling frustrated, I’m guaranteed a few encouraging messages from some of my favorite people. They may not know it, but this encouragement seriously helps. For me, it means even more than positive thoughts from my friends and family. These people are like me. They are riding the rollercoaster along with me and understand in a way that none of my IRL (in real life) friends can.

So to those of you on Twitter – you know who you are – who continue to lift me up, send me funny links, give me advice and generally just care… THANK YOU

The employment process is a two way street. There are employers and employees and if we don’t all do our part, the process will fall apart. In an economy with unemployment rates in the double digits, it can be difficult to keep it all together.

Honestly though, we (employers and potential employees) are handling the same tasks.

• I take time to sift through hundreds of job listings. Some of these listings are time wasters, they either want to con me out of money or they are listed under my city even though they are located in another state. Many postings make me shake my head and wonder what these people were thinking. Some try to re-word their posting to trick me into thinking the position is something that it really isn’t (it’s not a door-to-door salesman it’s a residentual marketing director!)
• You (employer, hiring manager, HR person) take time to sift through hundreds of applications and resumes. Some have grammar errors or don’t relate to the posting at all. Some make you shake your head and wonder what these people were thinking. Some try to re-word their resume to make it seem like they have the experience even though they obviously don’t.

You see? We’re not all that different.

That is why it pains me when an employer pulls over to the side of the road as I struggle to make it up the hill. If you expect me to follow up after an interview, you should really respond to my email or call. If you fill a position, you should really let me know so I can cross it off my list and stop sending those unanswered emails. If you are sending me a rejection email (which is painful enough to receive, but again, I’m just glad to hear back!) please at least spell my name correctly. My name is Danielle, not Daniel. I am a girl, not a boy. I go through great lengths to ensure that I spell names correctly and use the correct title. You should really do the same.

I realize that you are dealing with dozens of applicants and numerous jobs. But you expect perfection from me. If there is a spelling or grammatical mistake in my cover letter or resume, I’m in the trash without a second thought. I get it, we (job hunters) should take pride in our work and put a lot of effort into what we do, but shouldn’t everyone?

You want respect and strong work ethic and attention to detail from us and we simply want the same thing. It’s a two way street, that’s all I’m saying.

I’m not easily angered and I’m definitely not one to express any anger here on my blog. I’ve read too many horror stories about the consequences of blogs that are a bit too candid. But, let’s just be blunt… I’m incredibly annoyed.

The back story…
There is a girl, maybe you’ve heard about her already, who decided to sue her college because she hadn’t received a job offer. Basically, she felt that her school did not do enough to help her find employment.
My Twitter feed was a-buzz with negative feedback. People generally thought that this move would hurt her professionally, making her appear whiney and unable to accept responsibility. I remember one tweet even saying Who will hire her now?

Well… someone did. The Ski Channel did.

Now, I have to hand it to them, the company is definitely getting publicity from this (I’m blogging about it, I’m contributing, I know) but I don’t live by the motto that all publicity is good publicity. This has tacky stunt written all over it, starting with the fact that the job is in California and the potential employee is in NYC (and when I click on your press release and there is a picture of a half naked woman on the right hand sidebar linking to “Super Babes of Snow” I’m less than impressed). Nonetheless, the company is of less importance to me.

What bothers me so much and has me grinding my teeth as I type out this post, is that out of the millions of hard-working, responsible, dignified unemployed people out there, this girl gets a job offer. It even looks like they are creating a position for her! She exploited herself and her school and blamed someone else for her lack of success. The Ski Channel calls it ‘fiesty’ I call it ‘ridiculous’

Ranting aside, I do in fact take this with a grain of salt. In the press release the company founder and CEO even says;

If she is this fiesty, we’ll try her out.  But if she is playing the victim card and pushing her problems onto everyone else – then her job wouldn’t likely last long.

Not exactly the bode of confidence I would like my future employer to have for me.

We all think we’ll step out of the classroom and into a corner office at our dream company, then reality hits. I don’t blame my college for my current lack of unemployment. Sometimes I blame the economy (don’t we all these days?) but that is more for the lower numbers of opportunities than it is my ability to actually get a job.

Your college not preparing you is not an excuse. The crappy economy is not an excuse. These things are challenges. They have to be faced head on, dealt with and conquered. They are lessons to be learned. I am facing my challenges, not pointing my finger, and I know that my outcome will be positive. These challenges will make me a better employee and a better person, I have confidence in that and I’ll take ‘better’ over ‘fiesty’ any day.

Unemployment is a waiting game. You wait for the right positions to open up so that you can apply. You wait to hear back after you apply, crossing your fingers for an interview. You wait after the interview (the worst of the waiting) to see whether or not you got the job. If you are lucky, you’ll find out either way… or you may just wait around forever while the company fills the position and doesn’t tell you that you weren’t chosen. The waiting really starts to weigh on you.

I’ve had a couple of interviews lately which is why I’ve been holding my breath. Oh, and crossing my fingers of course. I think they are permanently stuck in the crossed position.

So, as I continue to wait, holding my breath and willing the phone to ring, I’ll leave you with some links. These sites helped me prepare for what I think have been some successful interviews. I hope they can help others too!

Interview Tips to Make Your Next Interview Your Last from the VisualCV blog (If you’re a job seeker and don’t have a VisualCV yet, definitely check them out! It’s free and easy and a great supplement to your resume.)

In job interview, passion packs a punch From MSNBC: an interview with the author of What Color is Your Parachute? Really great advice.

Ace the InterviewTo-the-point interview rules from David Silverman

And just in case… the negative side:

5 Common Reasons For Failure at a Job Interview From one of my favorite blogs by Bill Vick

Job Interview Tips: How to Handle Rejection From Lewis Lin explaining how to cope with the worst part of the job search

At one interview I was slightly thrown for a loop when I was asked “What are some of your pet peeves?”
Umm…uhhh…. *gulp*

When interviewing you shouldn’t say anything negative. You shouldn’t bad mouth former employers, coworkers, or anyone else for that matter. You can twist around ‘What is your weakness?’ (though lately I’ve been reading that you shouldn’t) but ‘What are some of your pet peeves?’ What do you say to that?!

I honestly don’t remember what I answered… probably something about a lack of communication within organizations because that definitely is one. I do remember that I was prompted to add more to the list and I couldn’t think of anything at the time. I was also afraid of the question; I didn’t want to say anything that might be held against me!

Today, while at a job fair, I was reminded of that question and realized what else could be added to my list.

A limp handshake.

image from globalexperiences.com

Seriously, why is the handshake so hard? I have gone to several job fairs, meetings and interviews and the majority of handshakes that I have received have been limp and lifeless. As a woman, I always get self conscious because I feel like maybe I’m coming on too strong. I don’t want a Vulcan death grip or anything, but a handshake speaks a thousand words. I may not be the most outgoing person, or the most self confident, but you’d never guess that by my handshake. It’s firm and proper and all I ask is that it’s reciprocated.

During my Speaking Before Audiences class at Auburn, we spent a week on interviews (this class was during a summer minimester). At the end of the week we had a short mock interview. I forgot to shake my TA’s hand and it wrecked my perfect grade. Maybe that’s when my handshake obsession focus began. No handshake or wimpy handshakes have bothered me ever since.

So is it just me? Do you think you have a good handshake? Are you bothered by those who don’t?

After working for a couple of companies, both large and small, I have realized just how vital internal communication is. I think that often companies don’t focus on it enough. The focus is usually on outside clients, customers and media. Companies aim their attention at keeping their customers and the public happy, but what about employees? Open conversations between managers, HR and employees lead to happier and more productive team members. Happy employees are the best advertising! I am more likely to do business with a company whose employees seem to enjoy their jobs and believe in the company they work for. Employee morale has a strong impact on business. Communication seems like such a simple thing and maybe that is why it is often overlooked.

Ask someone who is employed about problems that they have dealt with at their job, or listen to a random complaint from them. Often times, the problem is linked to a lack of communication. Maybe their benefits were messed up, they didn’t know about a policy change or their boss failed to mention something major that affected them. It’s all communication. Employees just want to be in the know… is that so much to ask?

Now, I’m not so naive to think that everyone can always know everything. Sometimes there are sensitive matters that can’t be discussed throughout the company. However, if something directly impacts an employee, I think it’s their right to be aware of it and have an opportunity to offer feedback.  

Communication is invaluable and shouldn’t be ignored or tossed aside. Lately I have read many articles about communication departments having to defend themselves. Showing the ROI of communication can be difficult and many companies are cutting corners. I hope that companies, large and small, realize the benefits of strong internal and external communication.

What are your thoughts on communication?